Sore

After all these weeks wondering if D would fulfill his obligations in correctly Dom-ing me, I was finally able to see for myself.

Turns out? He was totally up for the task.

I am so sore right now that sitting down writing this blog is uncomfortable, to say the least. I have a pretty high pain threshold, therefore don't be all "if you can sit the afternoon afterwards, it wasn't hard enough!" cause... well... you'd be wrong. It was by FAR the worst spanking I've ever gotten. I was in SO much pain that had I chosen to have a safeword, I would have used it.

Now onto the subject on why I chose to not use a safeword...

I may have a high threshold for pain, but that does not always mean I wish to exercise it. When it literally feels like Hades is being bombarded on my ass/upper thighs, I'm definitely not in the mood to practise my ability to handle pain.

Another reason is that I trust D (even more so now) to not harm me. Hurt me? Yes. Harm me? No. Knowing this, I trust his judgement in regards to disciplinary measures. I don't like being in control in a scene at all; in fact, when I'm put in charge the scene ends fairly quickly.

I don't switch, I don't Dom... I am Dominated. Period.

That stated, when someone gives me a safeword I feel some control... a "I can end this if I want to" kind of thing. I don't need that sort of mind frame, I like pushing boundaries and seeing what happens when a "button" is pushed, and I know I would take advantage of it.

I'm all for safewords, don't get me wrong! I'm just saying for a disciplinary spanking, I don't need to have one.

Back to last night... We counted it up this morning, and I got around 250 all in all with the implements brought. He used: His belt, an acrylic paddle, a wooden spoon, a wooden spatula, the bath brush, a hairbrush, and this cord whip he made at some point.

Damn. That shit hurt.

Well... I guess I know he's serious when he gives me a rule, eh? lol